SEASON 1, EPISODE 12, “ROB’S AFTERNOON OFF”
INT: Suburban Living Room
ROB FORD is entertaining friends JAMAAL, his drug dealer, ROXETTE, Jamaal’s girl, and MARTHA, a prostitute. Bottles and overflowing ashtrays cover the coffee table in the otherwise immaculate traditional-style living room. Rob is tooting a massive line of cocaine just as the front door opens and his wife, RENATA, enters, carrying shopping bags.
Honey, I’m home!
ROB (face comically covered in white powder)
GAAAHHH!! Lumma ferma gamma herp!
Oh, hey, Mrs. F.
Oh, hello, Jamaal. (to Rob) I’m sorry, honey, what did you say?
Rob gets up and moves to give Renata a bearhug.
Cumma har, babbababba. Lemma…
Rob falls over and completely obliterates the coffee table, sending bottles, ashtrays, cups and glasses flying everywhere.
Oh, dear. I better get something to clean that up.
She exits. Rob, sprawled on the floor, immediately begins snoring loudly. In a moment, Renata is back with a rag.
Is he… is he choking?
Oh, no, dear. That’s just his apnea. Now, would you all be so kind as to help me roll Robbie over so I can clean the Hennessy off the Oriental?
Sure, Mrs. F!