First, to follow up on my nostril widener post, I got a letter from my new BFF the SANOSTEC CORP.!!!!
“Rich - we read with some displeasure your Sinus Cones’ review.”
“Glad to hear that they helped you breathe, however, if they are fit or worn correctly
they stay put even during the night.”
OH, I’M NOT DOIN’ IT RIGHT!
“So two suggestions based on how they appear to fit in your photo, nice job
with that by the way:
1) trim them apart. They should fit mostly flush in your nose. The fact that
most of the Cone is visible outside your nasal airways, means that they are
either being prevented from sliding in all the way because of the way that
your nose is formed, or they are too large.
Once you have tried wearing them separated, if you find that they still come
out during the night, we recommend returning them to us for a free exchange
of the medium size in the clear, the MAX-AIAR NOSE CONES, which fit slightly
smaller and will therefore improve not only your look! but efficacy during
Breathe Well, Sleep Well
MAX-AIR NOSE CONES and SINUS CONES
Whew! I didn’t thank that was going to end well, did you? Reading the word “displeasure” in the opening line of an email instinctively causes ALL of my orifices—not just my nostrils—to clench at once. I might’ve begun with:
“Dear Rich: Thanks a ton for exposing our product to more people, even if they’re only the losers who read your blog…”
Or something, you know? But never mind. Great to get some helpful feedback, not to mention the offer of a free exchange, which is not just a special perk they are offering me, the celebrity nostril blogger. It’s standard SANOSTEC CORP policy—they don’t fit, they’ll exchange them for free.
What the SANOSTEC CORP doesn’t know about me is that when I spend $25 on an item (including shipping), I am loathe to trim away and discard large chunks of that item. As you’ll recall, the untrimmed Sinus Cones™ look like this:
Taking their suggestion, yesterday I trimmed away the middle thing (roughly $4 of my purchase):
You can see I left the little side wings on them. I wore them that way last night and not only did they work MUCH better (and I thought they worked well before), but they stayed in better.
But they still fell out sometime in the night. So, this morning:
AW, SNIP! Off with the side wings (and adios to another three bucks, or so)!
To refresh your memory, me, not doin’ it right:
Me, now doin’ it right:
Note the Karl Malden nose! I could ventilate a high school gym with these nostrils! And in spite of how it might look, Sinus Cones are totally comfortable. And I don’t see how in the world they are going to come out when I’m sleeping—they’re in deep and tight! (Never mind “what she said.”) So, thanks for the advice SANOSTEC CORP. I’ll keep you posted.
BUT THAT’S NOT ALL IN TINY NOSTRIL LAND!
September 15 can’t get here soon enough! Can’t wait to wrassle with the ‘gator!