Panels I won't be attending at SXSWi

SXSWi 2010: I’m in the blue shirt in the 57th row, 32nd from the left

 The packed hallways. The entitled young professionals. The obscene amounts of money at stake. But enough about my dermatologists office, let’s talk about SXSW Interactive

The baby brother of the SXSW music and film festivals is all growed up. In fact, it’s outgrowed its siblings. Come a week from today, the Austin Convention Center will be stuffed to the gills with thousands of people, all of whom work in a profession that barely existed 15 years ago.

Much more than the music and film festivals, the centerpiece of SXSWi is the slate of daytime panels. If you hope to get anything of value from attending the festival (aside from some free drinks and the phone number of that cute publicist from, you’ve got to pick the right panels to attend.

I’ve done some of the work for you. I’ve scoured the schedule and noted panels I think will be less valuable to attend. You won’t find me at:

Friday, 10 a.m., Mrs. Baird’s Ballroom
Ten Reasons Your Free Mobile App Will Not Sell

Friday, 1 p.m., Armadillo Roadkill Suite
The End of the Written Word—Tips to Change Careers from Copywriting to Food Service

Friday, 2 p.m., Willie Nelson Smoking Lounge
HTML5 Stole My Baby—Horror Stories from the Coding Pits

Saturday, 10 a.m., NerdJüs Energy Drink Day Tent
Drupal, Schmupal—Advanced Content Manglement Strategeries

Sunday, 11 a.m., Carole Keeton Rylander Strayhorn Marriage Chapel
Religion 3.0.1—Crowdsourcing a Hierarchical Monotheistic Belief System for the 21st Century

Sunday, 2 p.m., Mike Shea Dispute Resolution Facility
You Say Verdana, I Say Verdana—Typography’s Turmoils

Monday, 10 a.m., 3rd Floor Machine Room C (tell Gary the operations guy you’re there for the panel. He’ll bitch about it, but eventually he’ll let you in)
SXSWi 12—If You Think This Year’s Ridiculous…